Horoscope Blog - NOT happening

Over the weekend, I was considering starting another blog. It would have been all about how I would live my life according to my Google horoscope (actually, it's tarot.com written by Rick). It seemed like a good idea at the time because I could have interpreted the horoscope to say "go masturbate all day" or "go drink instead of thinking about life". It was going to be accompanied by photos and everything.

So today when I didn't feel like working, I looked up my horoscope.

Your daily routine may be disturbed today by an unavoidable emotional drama. You are pulled one way then another and it's hard to tell what's really happening. Forget about attempting to use your common sense, for this is an irrational time and can be quite exciting if you don't get too stuck on being so serious.

Shit. Take common sense away from me and you just have a crazy person. This doesn't sound fun to act out and blog about at all. I decided this ain't gonna work out. So no horoscope blog for me. Unless someone can interpret this to say something fun???

Horoscopes & Legal Disclaimers

Once again, I'm procrastinating. So I started perusing around Tarot.com (source of my frickin' Google horoscopes that I read everyday). Man. They have a lot of shit services!!! I mean I guess I'm not surprised, but they charge an arm and a leg to feed you bull shit.

I started to wonder what type of disclaimer they have on their website to protect themselves from frivolous law suits.

General Disclaimer:

Even though observing your personal cycles can help you see patterns, stimulate your intuition and make better decisions, information delivered by Tarot.com's products and features should be used with common sense. Tarot.com is not responsible for how you interpret or apply astrological or divinatory information.

Be advised that the accuracy of an astrology or numerology report is dependent on the accuracy of the birth data going in. Tarot.com is not responsible for the accuracy of birth-times as they have been recorded by governments, agencies or ephemerides. On Tarot.com we used the most widely-used interactive resource for determining true GMT -- the Astro Communications Services (ACS) Atlas -- which adjusts entered birth-times and places for time zones, daylight savings time, etc. We do not warranty the absolute accuracy of the ACS Atlas itself, even though it serves as the trusted resource for most computer-generated astrology charts and reports.

Classic!!! Sooooo, if they end up giving you a reading that's totally wrong, it's probably your mistake. Or the government's. Or the hospital.

I just thought it was funny. And deserved a post. Aaaand I really don't want to go back to writing that abstract...

Stoopid Life.

So those of you who know me, you know that I like to read my daily horoscope that iGoogle feeds me. (Well, I chose it to feed me this poison every day). Here's what mine says today:

It isn't easy to contain yourself today, for you are dreaming about the endless possibilities of what you could accomplish in your life. Sometimes it's hard to set your mind to do anything about your dreams, for you believe that your hard work will be wasted if your goals aren't realistic enough. Now, however, your efforts will be rewarded. It's time to go after what you really want.

Okay. So I'm hoping tomorrow, they're going to tell me what my frickin' dreams are. Because I haven't figured that out yet. Can my dreams in life be figuring out what my real dreams are in life???

With all that said, I don't really believe in these horoscopes. I just like to make a big deal out of them, as well as messages on fortune cookies. What can I say, they're entertaining!

PS - Dear horoscope writers, you shouldn't encourage people to do something drastic like "go after what you really want" because chances are, if they're crazy or stupid enough to really follow your "horoscope", that kind of advise can lead to those people really fucking things up... You know. And that would suck.